Summer of Mentorship 2019 Week Four Helen Smallbone
Don't Mom Alone Podcast
08/05/19
•50m
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Ever want to hear from the woman behind rock star kids?
In this episode, Helen Smallbone, mother of 7 grown children including Christian music stars Joel and Luke Smallbone (For King & Country) and Rebecca St. James, shares stories of motherhood and practical advice she’s learned along the way. She and her husband moved their family from Australia to America more than 25 years ago. It was a faith-building journey that changed their family forever.
“Sometimes when you face life crises what God’s doing is setting a new foundation. In this time, he took everything away from us,” Smallbone said. “We had no money, no resources, no family and no friends. But in that refining process, he gave everything back to us, but with a new foundation where he was the provider. He showed himself to be faithful for providing all our needs.”
- Stories of living by faith and God providing for the Smallbone family when they moved from Australia to America
- Homeschooling a large family and fostering responsibility and work skills in your kids
- Teaching family values while dealing with bad attitudes and behaviors in your kids
- Taking a “time out” as a mom to pray for your children and waiting on the Lord for breakthrough for specific ways to resolve behavior problems
- Focusing on the eternal value of building relationships with our kids versus the temporary focus on everyday tasks
- Spending time with children who may be acting out because they need more attention
- How quantity time often becomes quality time with our families
- Taking a traditional naptime or quiet time after lunch with fill yourself up to finish the day strong as a mom
- Keeping the communication line open with your children no matter their age.
Previous Episode
Summer of Mentorship 2019 Week Three Kim Fredrickson
July 29, 2019
•45m
As a licensed marriage and family therapist and life coach, Kim Fredrickson counseled and taught others about self-compassion for years. When she received an unexpected terminal diagnosis of pulmonary fibrosis, a rare side-effect of the treatment she had received for breast cancer, she wrote a book to leave for her children on giving that same compassion to the grandchildren she will never meet.
On June 3rd, 2019, Kim passed on to be in the presence of her Savior. We are grateful for a way to honor her legacy by re-releasing her fantastic mentorship. (This episode originally aired in January 2018).
When people feel ashamed, they blame other people because they feel like if I really look at my shame then I’m going to collapse inside. That’s why self-compassion is desperately important because kids feel shame a lot. They fail at everything at the start.
What we chat about:- Kim’s story of receiving a devastating diagnosis after completing treatment for breast cancer
- How she’s chosen to spend the years she has left with her family
- The new book she wrote for when her children have kids called “Give Your Kids a Break: Parenting with Compassion for You and Your Children”
- How it’s a process to develop a compassionate inner voice
- Applying grace and truth to every situation in our lives
- Variety of temperaments--some that are harder on themselves than others.
- The difference between self-compassion and self-pity
- Encouraging your children to practice self-compassion and reinforcing it by showing ourselves that same
- Giving our kids the language to identify their failings and separate them from their self- worth
- Moms have a really hard job. It’s ok to acknowledge that.
- The importance of taking care of ourselves as moms
- How to talk to your kids after you’ve been hard on yourself and reframing it with self compassion
Next Episode
Summer of the Mentorship 2019 Week Five Lynn Hoffman
August 12, 2019
•39m
Being a mom reveals your most broken places.
I often think motherhood would be easy if my boys behaved better. Or maybe if I read one more parenting book. Or if I finally caught the magical contentment unicorn just beyond my grasp.
Of course, none of those options really pan out (especially the unicorn). It’s my own junk. Every day the yuck in my heart rises to the surface. But with the pace of life and needs of my people, it’s hard to stop and examine the “yuck” more closely.
Recently our small group has been attending a recovery program at our church. Through some honest self-examination and community, God’s been showing me where I’ve held wrong beliefs. And how they impact my relationships.
Today’s podcast guest, Lynn Hoffman, helped start our church’s recovery program 15 years ago. And God also led her to write “Steps into God’s Grace”, a bible study based on the 12 steps of recovery.
In this episode, Lynn shares her own struggle with performance, people pleasing and codependency. She gives insight into why recovery isn’t just for addicts. And she encourages us to identify our own emotions so we can teach our children to do the same.
Recovery became a safe place where I could go and be with other people who were willing to be honest. Stop pretending and start talking about the reality of the problems in their life. And lean on God to change and discover new realities in their life.
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