Week Four Summer of Mentorship 2020 :: Sally Clarkson
Don't Mom Alone Podcast
07/27/20
•38m
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Sippy cup refill requests. Another load of laundry to fold. A sibling dispute.
Ever feel like you are reacting to life? Life is coming at you and you respond.
There have been many times in my mothering where instead of joy & hope I feel beat down and unfulfilled.
One woman who has whispered beauty and calm into those dark places, is today’s podcast guest, Sally Clarkson.
She told me motherhood can be more than just doing the dishes. It is an important job, guiding souls through discipleship and love. She taught me that my hard-to-handle boy may need me to sympathize more than instruct. She agreed boys may be a little wild. . .but showed me they can be civil & sip tea.
When I was coming out of a time of “not feeling like myself” Sally showed me how to own my life. To drop the negative thoughts which held me back. To consider what I wanted my days to look like and then make them happen.
He is the living, vibrant not-to-be-contained God. The more I would ponder God and engage with him in my own heart, the more my kids were drawing from me all the excellencies and realities of God. When we are passionate and filled with the Holy Spirit, our children will be exposed to the living God.
Sally has written her encouragement into a book called, “Own Your Life” (2015).
In this podcast episode, which originally aired January 6, 2015, I asked Sally all-the-things I’ve been pondering, from how to help your children really “know” God to simple advice on transforming a hard mom day.
What we talk about:- Why I struggle to read Sally’s books at the end of hard days.
- Every mom has her own mom personality.
- In spite of our mom errors, children can learn our hearts
- How do we help our children “Yadah” God...to know Him personally
- Living a life of color & taste & joy so our children see & know the goodness of the Lord.
- How we are motivated...not by guilt or checklists but by love & encouragement.
- Balancing grace & truth in parenting–practicing patience & love takes time.
- Definition of the phrase “own your life”-
- Sally’s example of a friend who “owns her life” in a special way why she serves her son with a disability.
- In an immediate gratification society, not forgetting the long term process of your life. growing day by day, little by little.
- Making sure you make time for yourself, to fill up before you pour out to the little people in your life.
- Common barriers to owning your life.
- Sally’s advice to a mom who was depressed
Previous Episode
Week Three Summer of Mentorship 2020 Francie Winslow
July 20, 2020
•48m
(This episode originally aired in 2016) Francie Winslow shares the exponential impact marital intimacy has on the world around us.
Sex is a multiplying factor in our lives, not just with producing kids, but producing a massive amount of connection.
In the past two years Francie has been doing extensive research on theology of the body. Exploring how God stamped His image on us. How we express our roles as image bearers through sex in marriage.
God is an invisible God who wants to make himself visible to us. When man and woman come together as one it’s his invitation for humanity to become one with God. Intimately connected with Him.
Francie shares their own family stress and her personal struggle with anxiety. Things that can disrupt marital connection. She vulnerably shares how she and her husband have purposefully chosen sex over isolation.
God’s training us to fight for connection and for each other instead of against each other.
Love Francie’s practical tips for keeping technology in check. So often screens and devices creep in between couples, increasing the distance and decreasing the intimacy.
Don’t miss the list of great resources below to help train your children in forming a healthy perspective of the body and sex.
What we chat about:- Francie’s journey to learn sex isn’t dirty or a duty but a delight.
- Her recent study of theology of the body.
- How anxiety and adoption stress led Francie and her husband to choose to have more sex (you read that right).
- How technology impacts our marital connection and practical solutions
- Help and healing for women who struggle with their view of sex.
- A reminder to daily do the things that keep you alive as a person.
- The Ripple Effect of sex in marriage.
- A word of encouragement for the single mom.
- Training our kiddos in a healthy sexual worldview (check out Francie’s resource list below).
- Sign up for Francie's free newsletter (http://franciewinslow.com/) As a bonus you will receive a free digital download of a Prayer to Ignite the Ripple Effect in Your Home along with 7 Days of Marriage Declarations to Experience More of Heaven’s Possibilities for Your Marriage. "
- Heaven in Your Home Podcast
- Soul Freedom (encore)Episode
- The Power of Sex in Marriage Episode
- Andy Crouch
- Beth Moore’s Daniel Study**
- Theology of the Body Books for Kids by Monica Ashour
Get these books (as many as you can!) and read them over and over and over. They are great for a range of ages – not just toddlers. Not only will it help form a great spiritual foundation for your kids as they enter a sexually intense world as kids (sadly it happens young these days), it will help you as a grown up re-learn how to think about bodies, sexuality and identity. It will also help give you simple, common language to use on an everyday basis in your home. They have all been such a big part of us growing in this new way of seeing the gift of sex as a family.
For older kids:
- The Talk: 7 Lessons to Introduce Your Child to Biblical Sexuality** by Luke Gilkerson (there are several others to go with this series too). Loving this one right now with my 8 year old.)
- Before I Was Born (God’s Design for Sex)** by Carolyn Nostrum
- Good Pictures, Bad Pictures : Porn-Proofing Today’s Young Kids ** by Kristen Jensen
Theology of His Body/Theology of Her Body** by Jason Evert (This was written with college kids in mind, but I found it super helpful and use it woven into conversations with my kids.)
For those who want more depth...Theology of the Body for Beginners
Next Episode
Week Five Summer of Mentorship 2020 Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith
August 3, 2020
•52m
As moms, we know we need rest. We usually equate rest with sleep or rest with a vacation, but this week’s guest shares a much bigger picture of our need for rest in multiple areas of our lives.
Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith is a medical doctor, wife and mother to two boys. She had everything she’d dreamed of and worked hard to achieve, but wasn’t enjoying it.
“So I kept pushing and pushing myself till I got to the point where I literally just burned out. I wasn't happy with my job. I couldn't see how my marriage would survive. I didn't want my kids anymore. I was just at the end of myself. I didn't want the life I created.”
After reaching this breaking point, she went on a journey of restoration and healing where she learned to connect with God and with his plan for rest. Now she shares her research and methods with her patients and with all of us. If you’ve ever felt tired and at the end of yourself, this episode is for you.
“We already have permission to rest, but the mommy guilt that sometimes comes tells us we don’t. That is really a lie. I look at it as the John 10:10. The thief comes to steal, kill, and destroy. And he's doing it to a lot of us through our inability to rest, our inability to trust God that when we lay things down that he is able to uphold them.”
What we chat about:
- When Saundra reached her breaking point from stress and lack of true rest
- We have physical limits to what we can do as moms
- How Saundra researched rest and looked at scripture for clarity on how God rested
- The seven types of rest are physical, to mental, spiritual, emotional, social, sensory and creative.
- The difference between a vacation and resting
- Paying attention to a place that feels painful in your body in the moment vs ignoring it
- Finding emotional rest through connection with friends, even through video chat if getting together is impossible
- The importance of authentic, open friendships with women who can relate to your life situation
- Ideas on how to stay engaged with your husband and reignite your marriage
- Putting limits on social media time so that your mind has down time
- Tips for getting mental rest and release ideas that make your mind race
- Sensory rest-- what it is and ways to get it
- It is not selfish to prioritize resting. It keeps you from having a toxic reaction to those around you.
Links Mentioned:
Website: http://ichoosemybestlife.com/
Book: http://ichoosemybestlife.com/sacred-rest/
Quiz: http://restquiz.com/
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