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Don't Mom Alone Podcast - Week Five Summer of Mentorship 2020 Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith
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Week Five Summer of Mentorship 2020 Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith

Don't Mom Alone Podcast

08/03/20

52m

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As moms, we know we need rest. We usually equate rest with sleep or rest with a vacation, but this week’s guest shares a much bigger picture of our need for rest in multiple areas of our lives.

Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith is a medical doctor, wife and mother to two boys. She had everything she’d dreamed of and worked hard to achieve, but wasn’t enjoying it.

“So I kept pushing and pushing myself till I got to the point where I literally just burned out. I wasn't happy with my job. I couldn't see how my marriage would survive. I didn't want my kids anymore. I was just at the end of myself. I didn't want the life I created.”

After reaching this breaking point, she went on a journey of restoration and healing where she learned to connect with God and with his plan for rest. Now she shares her research and methods with her patients and with all of us. If you’ve ever felt tired and at the end of yourself, this episode is for you.

“We already have permission to rest, but the mommy guilt that sometimes comes tells us we don’t. That is really a lie. I look at it as the John 10:10. The thief comes to steal, kill, and destroy. And he's doing it to a lot of us through our inability to rest, our inability to trust God that when we lay things down that he is able to uphold them.”

What we chat about:

  • When Saundra reached her breaking point from stress and lack of true rest
  • We have physical limits to what we can do as moms
  • How Saundra researched rest and looked at scripture for clarity on how God rested
  • The seven types of rest are physical, to mental, spiritual, emotional, social, sensory and creative.
  • The difference between a vacation and resting
  • Paying attention to a place that feels painful in your body in the moment vs ignoring it
  • Finding emotional rest through connection with friends, even through video chat if getting together is impossible
  • The importance of authentic, open friendships with women who can relate to your life situation
  • Ideas on how to stay engaged with your husband and reignite your marriage
  • Putting limits on social media time so that your mind has down time
  • Tips for getting mental rest and release ideas that make your mind race
  • Sensory rest-- what it is and ways to get it
  • It is not selfish to prioritize resting. It keeps you from having a toxic reaction to those around you.

Links Mentioned:

Website: http://ichoosemybestlife.com/

Book: http://ichoosemybestlife.com/sacred-rest/

Quiz: http://restquiz.com/

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Previous Episode

Sippy cup refill requests. Another load of laundry to fold. A sibling dispute.

Ever feel like you are reacting to life? Life is coming at you and you respond.

There have been many times in my mothering where instead of joy & hope I feel beat down and unfulfilled.

One woman who has whispered beauty and calm into those dark places, is today’s podcast guest, Sally Clarkson.

She told me motherhood can be more than just doing the dishes. It is an important job, guiding souls through discipleship and love. She taught me that my hard-to-handle boy may need me to sympathize more than instruct. She agreed boys may be a little wild. . .but showed me they can be civil & sip tea.

When I was coming out of a time of “not feeling like myself” Sally showed me how to own my life. To drop the negative thoughts which held me back. To consider what I wanted my days to look like and then make them happen.

He is the living, vibrant not-to-be-contained God. The more I would ponder God and engage with him in my own heart, the more my kids were drawing from me all the excellencies and realities of God. When we are passionate and filled with the Holy Spirit, our children will be exposed to the living God.

Sally has written her encouragement into a book called, “Own Your Life” (2015).

In this podcast episode, which originally aired January 6, 2015, I asked Sally all-the-things I’ve been pondering, from how to help your children really “know” God to simple advice on transforming a hard mom day.

What we talk about:
  • Why I struggle to read Sally’s books at the end of hard days.
  • Every mom has her own mom personality.
  • In spite of our mom errors, children can learn our hearts
  • How do we help our children “Yadah” God...to know Him personally
  • Living a life of color & taste & joy so our children see & know the goodness of the Lord.
  • How we are motivated...not by guilt or checklists but by love & encouragement.
  • Balancing grace & truth in parenting–practicing patience & love takes time.
  • Definition of the phrase “own your life”-
  • Sally’s example of a friend who “owns her life” in a special way why she serves her son with a disability.
  • In an immediate gratification society, not forgetting the long term process of your life. growing day by day, little by little.
  • Making sure you make time for yourself, to fill up before you pour out to the little people in your life.
  • Common barriers to owning your life.
  • Sally’s advice to a mom who was depressed

Next Episode

When I recorded this interview in 2015 I had no idea just two years later my father would pass away. Stacey's wisdom on grief became my lifeline.

This year with so many losses our hearts have experienced constant, low-level grief. On top of being quarantined, some of you may have lost loved ones. As moms, you've been unable to have time/space to grieve (or have a formal memorial service).

Today’s podcast guest is my soul sister friend, Stacey Thacker. She and I have been chatting about life, Jesus and family for the many years. Stacey writes online and has authored several books (a new one releasing in just a few months--Threadbare Prayer). When we conducting this interview Stacey shared so much of what she had learned from the loss of her father.

Since the interview she's experienced additional trauma and grief. Through it all she remains tethered to her faithful God. She is wise and can be trusted.

My hope is whether you are the one who has experienced loss or not, you will be encouraged that even when our worst fears are realized, God’s grace is ever present. And as Stacey points out:

“He holds all things together. And all things means all things.”

What we chat about:
  • How the message of Stacey’s book, “Hope for the Weary Mom” became real
  • How do moms grieve while handling the dailiness of motherhood
  • What actions and words of friends comforted her the most
  • How children grieve differently
  • How to be available and present with a grieving friend
  • What moments over the course of the year bring back grief
  • How do you manage your home when one child has to be hospitalized
  • How God holds all things together
Connect with Stacey:

Site :: Facebook :: Twitter :: Pinterest

Links Mentioned:

**Amazon affiliate links

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