Why Nobody is Having Sex Anymore (& why it matters) - Dr Debra Soh - #1072
Modern Wisdom
03/16/26
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Dr Debra Soh is a neuroscientist, sex researcher, political commentator, and author.
Why are we more connected than ever—but having less sex? Technology promised endless connection, but many people feel more isolated than ever. With sexlessness increasing, what’s causing the modern “sex recession,” and what can be done about it?
Expect to learn if people having less sex is a big deal or not, what the current state of modern sexual activity is, when the sex recession started and if rising hypergamy was a factor, if the role of porn attributed to the sex recession and the shocking new neuroscience of porn use, why looksmaxxing and plastic surgery are on the rise, the role of social media and smartphones had in growing sexlessness, what can be done top-down to fix the sex recession and much more...
Timestamps:
(0:00) Is Sex Really Declining? (4:13) When Did the Sex Recession Start? (7:24) Why Hypergamy Is Changing (16:26) Is Hypergamy Reshaping the Dating Market? (22:39) How the Pill Changed Female Sexual Choice (32:01) Life As a Romance Novel Model (33:27) How Modern Environments Disrupt Our Hormones (37:05) Porn’s Devastating Impact on Men (46:42) How Porn is Impacting Women (51:38) Is Porn Making Sex More Aggressive? (01:08:25) How Social Media is Rewriting Sexual Norms (01:14:10) The Beauty Standards Porn is Creating (01:25:04) Is Looksmaxxing Backfiring? (01:29:11) Is Sexlessness Destroying Marriages? (01:38:25) Is the Sex Doll Revolution Coming? (01:45:52) Why Connection Feels Harder Than Ever (01:47:48) Are We Opting Out of Having Children? (02:01:50) Can the Sex Recession Be Reversed? (02:05:36) Where to Find Debra
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Episodes You Might Enjoy:
#577 - David Goggins - This Is How To Master Your Life: lnkfi.re/SN-Goggins
#712 - Dr Jordan Peterson - How To Destroy Your Negative Beliefs: lnkfi.re/SN-Peterson
#700 - Dr Andrew Huberman - The Secret Tools To Hack Your Brain: lnkfi.re/SN-Huberman
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Previous Episode
Bill Gurley is a venture capitalist, general partner at Benchmark, and a former Wall Street analyst.
How do you find work you actually enjoy? So many people warn about the jobs they hate and the dreams they never chased. But turning passion into a career is harder than it sounds. So how do you reinvent yourself and build a life where work feels meaningful instead of miserable?
Expect to learn why most people end up having careers they regret, how to build a framework for regret minimisation, what people do that achieve success in their dream career, how to know when you’re plateauing versus when you’re just bored, what great mentors actually do that books and podcasts can’t, if someone can learn to love the grind or if it is something that’s innate, how you know if you’re in the wrong field versus just in the hard phase of the right field and much more...
Timestamps:
(0:00) What Career Regret Really Means (4:44) Why Uncertainty is So Uncomfortable (9:41) Why We Feel Obligated to Stick to One Career (15:05) Is Life Really “Use It or Lose It”? (23:04) How Some Of Us Successfully Pivot Careers (30:14) The Real Risk of Starting Over in Your 30s (38:42) Do Discipline, Motivation and Obsession Work Together? (41:54) Signs It’s Time to Change Your Career (48:30) Plateau or Boredom: How to Tell the Difference (50:12) Can You Upgrade Your Circle Without Losing Yourself? (54:49) Do Mentors Actually Make a Difference? (01:00:53) Can You Learn to Love the Grind? (01:07:37) The Pains and Pleasures of Reinventing Yourself (01:25:21) What Investors Look For in Founders (01:30:34) Founder vs Company: What Matters More? (01:42:01) Why You Should Lean into AI When Honing Your Craft (01:47:13) Which Careers Will AI Replace? (01:49:11) The Best Way to Start Your Career in Your 20s (01:50:56) Why Career Switchers Become Innovators (01:55:43) Where to Find Bill
Sponsors:
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Extra Stuff:
Get my free reading list of 100 books to read before you die: https://chriswillx.com/books
Try my productivity energy drink Neutonic: https://neutonic.com/modernwisdom
Episodes You Might Enjoy:
#577 - David Goggins - This Is How To Master Your Life: lnkfi.re/SN-Goggins
#712 - Dr Jordan Peterson - How To Destroy Your Negative Beliefs: lnkfi.re/SN-Peterson
#700 - Dr Andrew Huberman - The Secret Tools To Hack Your Brain: lnkfi.re/SN-Huberman
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Get In Touch:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chriswillx
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Next Episode
Gurwinder Bhogal is a programmer and a writer. Gurwinder is one of my favourite X follows. He’s written yet another megathread exploring human nature, cognitive biases, mental models, status games, crowd behaviour and social media. It’s fantastic, and today we go through some of my favourites. Expect to learn what the Oxytocin paradox is, why anxiety is now the most common mental health condition in the world and why the Rumpelstiltskin Effect might be to blame, the reason why 20% and 40% of undergraduates at many elite American universities are now registered as disabled, what AI will do and make to best steal our attention, why 1% of users generate 99% of the content you see online, whether you’re the person who doesn’t know how to improve their life or someone who doesn’t know when to stop and much more...
Timestamps:
(0:00) Can Empathy Make You Cruel? (8:19) Does Diagnoses Actually Solve Anything? (20:09) Why So Many People Now Identify As Disabled (23:09) The Harmful Power of Slopaganda (25:34) Can Truth Survive the Information Overload? (33:00) Why Social Media Isn’t Real Life (36:41) The Rise of Red Pill Content (42:04) Can Stress Actually Make You Happier? (58:21) Do Standards Outweigh Capacity? (01:02:23) Why We Focus On Our Weaknesses (01:10:16) Is Main Character Syndrome Warping Reality? (01:17:28) Why You Should Argue Like Your Opponent Will Win (01:22:01) Will Everything Eventually Become Illegal? (01:24:46) The Hype Cycle of New Technology (01:31:32) Nature vs Nurture: What Really Shapes Us? (01:34:41) What Your Worldview Reveals About You (01:38:04) Is Optimistic Pessimism the Best Mindset? (01:43:29) Where to Check Out Gurwinder
Sponsors:
See discounts for all the products I use and recommend: https://chriswillx.com/deals
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Extra Stuff:
Get my free reading list of 100 books to read before you die: https://chriswillx.com/books
Try my productivity energy drink Neutonic: https://neutonic.com/modernwisdom
Episodes You Might Enjoy:
#577 - David Goggins - This Is How To Master Your Life: lnkfi.re/SN-Goggins
#712 - Dr Jordan Peterson - How To Destroy Your Negative Beliefs: lnkfi.re/SN-Peterson
#700 - Dr Andrew Huberman - The Secret Tools To Hack Your Brain: lnkfi.re/SN-Huberman
-
Get In Touch:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chriswillx
Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/chriswillx
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/modernwisdompodcast
Email: https://chriswillx.com/contact
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