When Parenting Feels Uneven: Helping Your Partner Step In
Creating a Family: Talk about Adoption, Foster & Kinship Care
06/17/26
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Many parents raising adopted, foster, or kinship children feel like they’re carrying most of the parenting load alone. Talking about it and changing it can be hard. In this episode, Josh Davis, PhD, shares practical, non-blaming strategies to improve communication, build confidence, and create a stronger parenting partnership when raising kids from hard places. As Father's Day approaches, Josh also offers some downloads for Dads!
In this episode, we discuss:
- How common is it for one person in a partnership or marriage to feel as if the parenting load is uneven?
- How can we influence the relationship to invite our partners into a more balanced dynamic?
- What are the common reasons partners step back instead of stepping in?
- What are some signs that maybe criticism—even subtle—is affecting our partner’s willingness to engage?
- What do you mean by “lowering the barrier to involvement?”
- How can we offer specific, doable examples to our partners without “telling them what to do?”
- What scripts can we use, or what language, to invite partnership?
- For parents/caregivers raising challenging kids who require a LOT of time, energy, emotional investment, etc., what are some helpful ways to stay emotionally connected and protect their marriage or partnership?
- If a listener wants to take what they’ve learned here and invite their partner in to share the parenting load, what are one or two first steps to try?
Resources:
- Celebrating & Supporting Men in Foster & Kinship Care
- Josh Davis, PhD - www.joshdavisphd.com/www.joshdavisphd.com and www.nlpfordads.com
- Why Mentors are Crucial When Raising Relative Kids
Please leave us a rating or review. This podcast is produced by www.CreatingaFamily.org. We are a national non-profit with the mission to strengthen and inspire adoptive, foster & kinship parents and the professionals who support them.
Creating a Family brings you the following trauma-informed, expert-based content:
- Weekly podcasts
- Weekly articles/blog posts
- Resource pages on all aspects of family building
Previous Episode
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Question: Our daughter is 11 months old and was adopted through an open adoption. We have a relationship with her birth mother, but don't yet feel it's the right moment to ask about family history, and her birth father is completely unknown to us. We do know that both birth parents are Hispanic, but beyond that, we have no additional information about her heritage or background. We want her to grow up with as rich a sense of her identity and heritage as possible. What guidance do adoption professionals offer around using genetic testing like 23andMe or AncestryDNA for adoptees? Is there an age-appropriate time to do this, or is it better to wait and let her decide for herself when she's older? Are there any other considerations unique to the adoptee experience we should keep in mind?
Resources:
- Genetic Testing for Adoptees: Key Considerations and Benefits
- Genetic Testing for Adoptees - Is It Worth It?
- Genetic Testing and Genealogy for Adoptees
Listen here to learn more about our Executive Director, Linda Fiore
Please leave us a rating or review. This podcast is produced by www.CreatingaFamily.org. We are a national non-profit with the mission to strengthen and inspire adoptive, foster & kinship parents and the professionals who support them.
Creating a Family brings you the following trauma-informed, expert-based content:
- Weekly podcasts
- Weekly articles/blog posts
- Resource pages on all aspects of family building
Next Episode
Drop us some Fan Mail. Thanks!
Question: We’re getting close to adopting our foster child, and I keep worrying there are things we should be asking for before finalization that we don’t even know to request. What information or records should we make sure to get from the agency so we truly understand our child’s history and needs?
Resources:
- 23 Crucial Questions to Ask at Foster Care Placement Meetings
- Are You Considering Foster Care Adoption This Year?
- Adopting a Child of a Different Race or Culture
Please leave us a rating or review. This podcast is produced by www.CreatingaFamily.org. We are a national non-profit with the mission to strengthen and inspire adoptive, foster & kinship parents and the professionals who support them.
Creating a Family brings you the following trauma-informed, expert-based content:
- Weekly podcasts
- Weekly articles/blog posts
- Resource pages on all aspects of family building
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